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Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!

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Turns out, there’s been a theft. Some guy snatched a bag from a tourist. Classic, right? I mean, who robs a tourist in broad daylight? We start asking around, and this one dude, he’s like, “I saw him! He ran down Jalan Yos Sudarso!”

Medan councilor investigated for viral assault of flight attendant